Philosophical cow dung on the life of little Ms. Imperfectly Fine.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Muse concert (how I got Dom's setlist)

And it was a day to remember.

When Jan told me that Muse was coming to KL, I knew then and there that I was going to see them, by hook or by crook, most likely by begging one of my bro's to get me a ticket.

The show was super. I mean there I was trapped in the sea of humans, body contorted in positions I never thought was humanly possible, drenched in sweat not all of it was mine, and it was well worth it.

If you read Jan's account, you should know that we got separated just as the show was starting. I've never liked being pushed around, especially in concerts so, I dug my heels and stood my ground. Well.. in fact I fought my way further up until I was just one person away from the very front. When one is determined, one will find one's way.

And the view there was even lovelier. I had a great shot of the band. One thing sucky about having a good spot is that more often than not, ambitious people would want to take it away from you. So I had to violently defend my post which kinda remove the fun of enjoying the music at times. However, I'm so glad that the kind gentlemen who were guarding the stage were also kind enough to give us water so we could scream our love without permanently damaging our vocal cords. Thank you God..

And if you've read Jan's account, you'd also know that I managed to acquire Dom's (the cute drummer) setlist. I must admit, I have a thing for setlists. I love to collect them. So here's the story.

After the show and as the crew were busy cleaning up the stage and packing the equipment. I asked some random local cameraman to get me the setlist. Actually, I had Matt's setlist in mind and that guy was going to hand it to me until a couple of security guards took it off his hand and threw it to another group who were only riding on my loud request. I was pissed beyond compare and knowing that I still have one last shot at it, stayed on.

Then I saw this (probably) British dude tidying up the drum set, knowing that Dom's setlist was still intact, I shouted towards him.

"Excuse me! May I have the setlist please?"

That was it, my voice carried through. He looked up and saw me, I smiled and repeated myself and I might have threw in a British accent while I was at it too. He nodded.

I waited with nervous anticipation as he made his way to the edge of the stage with the precious document. I was afraid that he was going to give it to the security guard and once again that ^$$(10wn would try to rob me off my rightful treasure.

Instead the cute crew dude climbed down from the stage and walked towards me. All around, the screaming vultures were at it again, attempting to screw me by confusing him. But, that man was an angel, he folded the paper and placed it safely in my hands away from the outstretched arms of those with evil intentions. It was the most beautiful thing. I thanked him kindly.
So, that's what happened at the Muse concert. I suffered from aching muscles afterwards and as the pain slowly went away it was harder to believe that we actually went to see them at all. *sigh Hopefully, they'll return in a couple of years because man, they are indeed, awesome.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Small Heart(s) live performance

On the 3rd of March 2007, I went back to my old college where I did my pre-degree course back in 2003. A lot of things have changed since I last visited the place but this entry will not be touching on that. Instead, I'm gonna talk about my experience singing my very own song in front of the general public.

Some of you may or may not know that I wrote this one song called small heart(s). Lets just say that I was inspired to write it after drinking "a can of honey" and got drunk on love.

Anyway, I was very careful when it comes to the lyrics this time. I'm not sure why, usually when I write songs, the words just appear and fits itself into the melody. This time I had some time to think about what I wanted to say. And so it became;

My eyes have read your thoughts in sounds
in my despair I see no bounds
sketches of dreams agleam in white
with patches of dark colored spite

*each day my heart becomes smaller
I'd sell my soul to grow taller
to reach you again and again
will you burn and cry for me then

tease me with your sweet promises
though they suffocate my senses
I would endure this suffering
by your heart to heart murmuring

repeat *

I've waited so long to be healed
now all these things pierced through my shield
I never thought the one I seek
would render me completely weak

repeat *

satin leash tied to my collar
I have wondered which is crueler
to wait in pain or die in vain
take me or leave me locked and chained.

Words and music by Ana Raffali (anaraffali muzik ent.)
So, that's as honest as I could get with that. Guitar playing wise, somehow I develop a fingerpicking skill for this song, I'm not exactly sure where I might have stolen the sequence but it sound perfect for the song. I remember testing it out at home by singing and playing at the same time until Jannah was practically crying, "enough about selling your soul lah!!" Thanks for the support, sis!

When abg Ahmad came to visit during raya, I played the song and he offered to play the John Mayer version for me to post on youtube. It was funny enough singing your own song out loud, but to have everyone wanting to contribute to the video was beyond hilarious. Acat was doing some dirty dancing, Jan was stomping her way wearing Ahmad's brand new pair of crocs and my mom, well she was just curious. And not to forget our little customers that came over to our house to get some ice-blended delights. All in all, it was a fiesta and a memorable one indeed.

So I kept on practicing and showing it to my bandmates. And when the time came to decide what we should do for this one particular performance, Icky said we should stick to small hearts (he added the s) as opposed to my all time favorite, creep by radiohead.

I nearly turned yellow and chickened out. I was so nervous, my tummy disagreed with me. It was almost unbearable. But when I got up there, I just had to sing. And it was awesome, the feeling of having almost everyone in the room listening to the voice of your heart to me was magical. I remembered someone, my very own muse, telling me;
"Great artists convince their audience that their art is about them, and no one else. You could go to a show and see some singer and you will swear that singer is singing those words right to you, regardless of the fact that there are hundreds of people in the room. That's what great artists do."
He was right and it was worth it.

The thing is I'm beginning to hold a suspicion that this song somehow strangely draws distraction whenever it is performed in public. I hope to disprove this, but I suppose I need to develop the discipline of not panicking when everything around you works its own way.


This is the latest version of the song with minor changes in the lyrics

*each day my heart becomes smaller
I'd sell my soul to grow taller
to reach you again and again
if I burn would you cry for me then?

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

My to do list

Too lazy to write these days, but will make an effort to write one blog a day based on the this list.
In no order of urgency or importance;
  1. Muse concert (how I got Dom's setlist)

  2. sevencollart-shirt acoustic gig (doing the backup vocals)

  3. the President of Ethos

  4. National Choir

  5. Japan; opening files and folders

  6. My very own muse

  7. Photography

  8. revisited

  9. Bukit Sekilau and TC (fun day at the beach)

  10. Small Heart(s) live performance

  11. Dishwalla; the greatest band in my life

  12. Nabil & Aidil singing career

  13. Acoustic Jamming @17

  14. How come I don't read books anymore

  15. Friendship; what happens when it sinks.

Hope that'll work. Now here's today's blog entry.

Picture by Camille,
[My thanks; this is almost as wonderful as the real person]

everyone has their own light of happiness in their own two hands. why give it away? why put that light into the hands of another and expect him or her to take good care of it? when you and I both know that it's not easy taking care of something you can never be entirely sure of, just because it's not yours and you don't know what it really needs.

so what do we do. keep that light shining in our hands for others to see. when they see how bright the light just as it is, maybe they will learn to love us without having to take that glow away.