alter ego and RANtAi

I'm starting a side-blog in malay. Just another way of expressing myself. I think it's not fair to write songs in malay and english but not a blog in malay and english. I know I'd save more time by being bilingual in here but, I don't wanna mix things up.

I'll try to divide equal attention and love between my bloglings. ;p

***

Dark clouds were hovering before we, (Ana Raffali and the Marhaens) walked out of our HQ for a short drive to the Red Bungalow. It rained like a showerhead, opened and stucked in full-blast. One can only be grateful that one is not atop tall buildings handling electrical appliances while lightning was celebrating its existence.

The public's reception of us was pretty sweet. It felt so good to be able to play alongside the Marhaens again, although the line-up this time was different with the addition of Abg Mie (Flop Poppy's drummer) and Abg GG (guitarist and guitar luthier), to the original cast and crew Abg Aidit, Abg Andy FP and Adik Iqbal. ;p

It was the first time we played My Darling to its fullest rock potential. Ahh.. I so wanna play it again and again.

13 Dec

I'll be performing for a RANtAi event.It's been a while since I blogged extensively. For a change I'll try to document the preparation for the gig. ;)

Link to the event

A little confusion

Here's something to ponder.

I received a call from the bearer-of-good-news-thus-far with a bad news saying that the organizer decided not to pick us (Ana Raffali and the Marhaens) for the upcoming celcom UOX gig.

Not a big deal, really. (I've secured another special gig on the very same day.)

However, imagine my surprise when I visited this page to find that the voting is still going on. Now, if one has decided not to feature someone then it would only be right and civil to be more transparent about it. I. e. there shouldn't be any voting since the acts have been decided earlier on (reportedly). My sincerest apologies go to all of those who have voted before and recently. I appreciate your time, effort and phone credits.

In short, Ana Raffali and the Marhaens are not going to play for the UOX thingy.

Dear friends and family

Guess what! I've been chosen as one of the possible performers for UOX Play this 13 Dec on the Sungei Wang Rooftop. It's soooo cool, of course it'll be cooler if we do actually get to perform there. So, I need your help to land me the gig.

Please follow the following steps;

1) Sign up here to entitle yourself to vote.
2) Go here to vote for me. ;)
3) Receive my deepest and warmest gratitude.
4) Wait and pray for the best.

Wish me luck!


DISCLAIMER:

You can stop voting now. There has been one big misunderstanding. Apparently, I was a little behind with the whole voting thingy. You have voted at the wrong page, the real voting page has yet to be announced. Thank you for your votes thus far. I would appreciate it if you could vote again when the actual voting page is put up by the organizer.

More information regarding the event can be found here.

If I get the votes, then I'll be sharing the stage with indie bands; Butterfingers, Hujan, One Buck Short, Tempered Mental, Laila's Lounge, They Will Kill Us All and Bittersweet. That's just amazing... :o amamamamazzzzing...

I'll post the actual links when I can, so hang tied. ;p

Hujan Bunga di Bandar Kuching

Right after my french exam, I took a plane to Kuching for my first ever visit to Borneo. I was invited to perform for a kindergarten graduation ceremony as well as emceeing the event. In case you haven't figured out, I adore kids. They are such a joy to be with and having them singing "kalau rasa gembira" (if you're happy and you know it) complete with all the motions was simply amazing.

Of course it was absolutely spontaneous. The gleam in their eyes when I took Woodie out was unforgettable. They were crowding around me as if I was holding a golden monkey or something extraordinarily wonderful. And when they recognize the tune I was playing of course they just had to dance and sing along. It was magical. We repeated our act onstage afterwards and it was equally as memorable.

I sang HBKL(Kuching version) and Sepasang Sudu, a song that I only played once in a gig. Woodie did not disappoint. Although I forgot to change the strings and it was buzzing a little, the music was sweet enough to carry my voice, which happened to be recovering from a bad cold.

I don't really know what's wrong, but I seem to be prone to catching colds. Well.. maybe I do have a tiny suspicion of what might be causing the frequent sniffles, but it's not like I can change my bad habits as easily as saying "I will change my bad habits".

I am having a bad cold right now, bad as in the asthmatic kind. Kak Zaza had to give me a jab a little north from my seat of wisdom. They say that it hurts more if you're really sick and lemme tell you, I am probably sick as heck cause it felt as painful as heck. The temptation to cancel my appearance in ARTrage could not equal to this one single thought: the show better be worth the pain in the ^$$.

Well, considering the fact that I'll be playing with Iqbal (si pemain cello), and him alone, it should be mighty interesting and gutwrenching. I suppose the worst thing that could happen was if I were to forget the lyrics to my own song. Not that I have so many songs that would render me incapable of recalling them under gutwrenching circumstances anyway. At least not yet. ;)

ARTrage Lab

Please bring your RM8 along. ;p

l.i.v.e.01

We're recording the first single. In the meantime, here's a bootleg dvd selling for RM8. Of course you can only get it from me in my shows, so see you then! ;p

1, 2.. JUS

Tonight's the night.

8.30 pm NTV7.

I Like To Move It, Move It with Madagascar 2!

I

Like

To

Move

It,

Move

It

with 

Madagascar 2!

Plus 4th November is my birthday!! Hint hint. Can la? XOXO.

Hari Bintang Jatuh

Wow.. it seems like forever since I last sang in public. I hope I can make up for the lost time. Oh, I'll also be standing by Jane's Fotobooth, do come and visit.

*This is Jane menyibuk; the booth is all about you. Yes, you. You guys perasan tak semua gambar2 Ana Raffali yang sangat hot and happening tu (cis ayat poyo nak mampos)? Those pictures were taken by none other than the elusive Aboutthelettera guy. Mamat ni shy gila, tapi jangan la segan dan malu nak bagitau dia (he's the photographer, I'm just the pimp mama) what you want in the pictures during the fotosession. 

Tapi kalau you sendiri segan or tak kesah tentang the outcome of the pictures, kami ada art director merangkap partner in crime misteri yang akan muncul tanpa diundang untuk membantu you decide what's the best pose would make you all drop dead handsome/gorgeous dan sebagainya. 

Details lebih lanjut kena datang sendiri that day okay? 

Pembaca blog saya sila tegur Jannah tau? Kita buat camwhore session kejap tepi booth nanti.

New Nokia Fund

Now as I watch you from afar...

I lost my Nokia N95 while watching a Nokia sponsored movie. Talk about irony.

You can still call me on my number but please introduce yourself.

And don't forget to click on the adverts shown courtesy of Nuffnang.com

It's part of my New Nokia Fund.

That is all.

Comments on 90:10

I think the comments left on my last post deserves more discussion. Allow me to devote an entire entry on my feedback.

acat said;

houston we have a problem. 90:10 is about creating opportunities. opportunities for the local talents to show what they got. that our music is at par or even better than our aural neighbours. u do have to wonder how they do it. i mean u have to admit that their songs are good. so how? even if u have 90% local content, the 10% still have a big influence on how people buy music. well those that buy anyways.

rather than limit the influx of foreign music to 10%, why don't we just play the 10% that just sucks. expose people to the uglier side of their music. i'm sure not all coming over here are that good anyways.

but then we come across the dilemma of who decides who sucks? coz clearly music is very subjective and one person's shrieking banshee cries might be an angelic serenade to the other.

for me i feel that good music is good music is good music. u listen to the music that makes u feel good. be it local or foreign. i for one do not want to be told that hey i can't listen to this band or that band just because they're not local.

but i guess it boils down to opportunities. maybe by having this 90:10 rule we would have more opportunities to uncover the hidden gems in our local music industry.

whether or not that's enough to make you go out and buy their cd's is another thing all together la kan.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008 5:57:00 AM

Acat,
I agree that good music is good music. The reason why we get more good Indonesian songs over here is simple mathematics. Said country is huuuuge, the more people they have, the bigger the ratio for songs to be written. Let say that only 1 out of 10 songs that are played on the radio will be a hit. The more songs you have, the more hit songs you gonna get as well. Do the math.

Most of the foreign musicians that perform here are already "kaya raya" back at home. They have managed to tough out the competition there, of course we only get to taste the cream of the crop. But what about finding our own cream of the crop? That's why we need more opportunities i.e. slots for our musicians to tough it out, I believe, instead of unnecessarily promote music that has already made it (popularized).

The idea is that the more you play local songs, the bigger the chance that more good songs will be discovered by their target listeners.

When you have the same old song played over again and again, you're not changing anything.

effi said;

I wrote a mini blog in here just now. I think it was in access of 800 words. But somehow it was deleted by blogger due to some internet shit

But I will soldier on and try to rewrite it again. GOD I HATE BLOGGER sometimes

Here is a cliff note on what I wrote earlier. Penat!

1. 90:10 will be NEP kind of directive.

It is then open to abuse with people just trying to make the numbers with disregard to quality. We are in a modern world with an open market. This is not the 80's anymore. People will still listen to music asing even with 90:10 in place. As a result 90:10 will be a failure anyway resulting in radios having to close shop. Worse case scenario, not many radio to play songs and we are back to square one.

2. Malaysian voted with their ears and wanted indo songs because of two reason.

a) Malaysian artistes are mostly prefab, fake, factory assemble , pretty face automatons forced to conform to what the record execs wanted to sell to the people. They have no say on their musical direction or what they think is good for them. All Malaysia artistes started this way. Only when they started to carved their own name they have a say on what they want. This is a very small percentage. It is not we don’t have talent but we have stunted talent no thanks to record execs. 90:10 will give the execs more reason to pigeonhole the talents into specific genres. We don’t need 90:10. We need a revamp on the way music is being managed here. Torn down the old regime and I say we will see marked difference sharpish!

b) Malaysian artistes mostly don't write their own song. As cool as Wings, Search and XPDC are they relied on LOLOQ, MNASIR and JS KEVIN to write their stuffs. It came as no surprise that XPDC died a horrible death as soon as JS KEVIN passed away 5 years ago. They just dunno how to write good shit. Butterfingers in the other hand write their won music. You can actually see the musical evolve over the past 15 years. Now that is one band that will always get my vote! Will the implementation of 90:10 guarantees better music quality or we are just giving "writers" silly excuse to dump mediocre composition on us?

I am sure you have heard this argument before right Anna? I see your points but 90:10 will be a failure. It won’t change a thing. They should have instead champion the right for musicians to have the freedom to choose what they want to be and play. That would be a worthy cause to fight

Good luck in your career Anna. I love your stuff thus far. I like your stuff because it's better than the crap I heard on the radio. Not because you are Khalid or Jannah's sister

When will the album be out? I want to plug your album on my blog nanti.

P/s: abaikan typo. I was pissed the last comment was lost in cyberspace!

Sunday, September 28, 2008 1:13:00 PM

effs,
I don't think the objective is to curb people to listen to what they like. So if you like Indonesian songs, go la buy the cd. Support the music that you love!

It's just that with the way things are going, it's just isn't helping our local music industry to grow. The reason why 90:10 could make a whole lot of difference is that it targets the origin of how a song gets to be popular, through the local radio which is accessible to almost everyone provided they have a mechanism that allows them to tap into the stations.

You never know whether a song is good or not unless you hear it out. Most good songs get buried in the pile of unknowns because radio stations would rather prefer to play sure-fire hits than experiment and take risks. Why not cut down on the old hit songs and give us potential new hit songs for a change.

I see your points as well, Effs, but I do believe that since 90:10 is the brainchild of composers and musicians within the local music industry, they have the full knowledge of what's really going on. It's not something that was thought out overnight or cooked up at parties or whatever. This is serious business, and who else should take the business seriously if not for the people behind the music business.

Changing ideologies and mentality is rather optimistic if not idealistic. You want people to start having the freedom to choose what they want to be or play. What makes you think that the freedom is not there? I just think it was never really exercised by some people. Maybe they honestly want to, but they can't because they don't really believe in themselves and their music to fight for it. Or their interest was in the money from the very beginning and not for the sake of the art. Doing nothing is as much of a choice as doing something. There's always an alternative.

On a personal level, I am grateful for the fact that I am able to write songs that are close to my heart, songs that are not based upon a formula that was dictated by the music industry since I have no idea what that formula is and even if I do, it would be to avoid it. I'm trying to make a small difference here, but I realized that my efforts would be in vain without being given the chance to be heard.

90:10

I'm too lazy to write what 90:10 stands for but, if you could make a quick visit to read what a rather interesting and active blogger I met have written about it, you might be able to get the back story. (NOTE: Thanks for the support, Mr. Manager!)

...

Thank you for taking the time to read up on the issue.

As Mr. Manager have kindly mentioned that I "fearlessly spoke at the forum", let me share with you my opinion on the matter.

So we have this problem that foreign songs have been dominating the public airwaves. By dominating I mean, constantly being played by radio stations, sometimes even back to back. This is proven as potentially dangerous for our local music industry to be sustainably profitable since the promotion of new artists and new albums and songs is depended upon these radio stations.

It seems to me that a lot of people have been hankering on the point that there should not be any prejudice towards music. I agree. But the reality is that it happens.

My brother, Asyiq was driving me to practice one day. We were listening to a local pop radio station.

"Kenapa sekarang banyak betul lagu-lagu dari Indonesia?"

My brother has been away in Moscow for his studies.

"Entahlah.."

I guess people haven't been really noticing what they are being fed nowadays. The thing is, since we are being fed with it on a daily basis, the phenomena just crept up on us without us really realizing it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about good music speaking for themselves. But you have to give enough opportunities for good music to be heard. Instead of asking the question why 90:10, ask yourself, why not 90:10? We have to start caring about our music and how it affects our daily lives.

I'm rooting for the 90:10, not because my life is affected by it, it's because we are all in this together. Stop saying that our music industry is dead or we don't have many or enough good songwriters. We do have a lot and we have to start believing that they are enough to sustain our musical needs.

I think it's rather funny that the other party have been saying that it's unfair for us to put such demand, have you ever asked yourself why our musicians don't really get as much support from their side, though music as they say is universal?

Sweet!

nonsense 1

I was waiting for the bus close to 2 hours. When it finally reached the bus stop, it just went on his way without me.

I didn't miss the bus, the bus missed me!

And it was raining, my nose was running. Worst, I was running out of tissues. And I had to make a run back to the train station to catch the train to another train station.

And I had to choose that day of all days to lug around the biggest and baddest bag that I could bag which was lying around at home, begging to be bagged. That bag was probably heavier than its content.

Well, I guess I probably lost some weight from the ordeal. That's why I have the opinion that people who go to gyms are rather into s&m.

11 a.m

So, I didn't cry buckets. I didn't cry into the sea. Trust my mischievous heart not to allow myself to break down and break apart.

Have I dealt with my fears? Have I lifted the guilt and buried the misery of unspoken sincerity? Maybe yes sounds more hopeful than maybe no, but are they not the same?

Maybe they are...

I suppose this is one of those days that refused to be dismissed as just any other days. It's a day that shall determined the strength of my convictions, my sense of purpose.

So, I'll trust what's left of my heart to whisper to the half that was given away, not to flinch or falter as they try to prove us wrong.

1 a.m

I don't cry. I rarely cry. But tonight, I feel like I want to spill buckets. I want to soak my sorrow in my tears. Wash this guilt and misery away.

I could cry into the sea, and the waves will keep on crashing.

Random I

This was simply historic. The last time I was in a bookstore with my dad was when I was little and I had an obsession for Enid Blyton's book. It was so adorable, my dad was kinda shy. He'd rather buy a book instantly without browsing through its content. So I had to ask the attendant to unwrap the book for him. I mean, if you're buying something, you need to know if it's worth buying of course.
This little precious bundle of love is Jada Kyra, my newborn niece (actually she wasn't newly born, her birthday; 20/07/2008). I went to see her the first time bringing Damo with me. Apparently, Jada likes my music, or at least I like to think so. She was making disgruntled sounds before I picked up the guitar and played HBKL. And the little sweetie kept quiet and just listened. It was funny the way her eyes were turned sideways to better see me sitting on the sofa to her right. The theory is that my sis, kak Juan went to see me perform at Laundry. Jada must have heard me while she was inside her mother's womb and liked what she heard. ;)

Gig on the 23rd

Mine

TGA STR dlx

Grand Auditorium body

Solid Spruce top in gloss finish

Multiple bound top, tapered body

Rosewood back and sides, gloss

Mahogany neck, matt

Oval shaped, rosewood fingerboard

Nickel silver frets

Rosewood Bridge

Compensating saddle

Gold stepped tuning buttons

Meet my new buddy, Woodie Mallamy. I got this from my first cheque (yay!) courtesy of my record label, Indah Karya owned by Aidit Alfian.

This is a rather huge step from Johney and Damo. I got Johney 2 years ago. I didn't know what good guitars are capable of doing then, so I chose Johney basely upon face value. It was rather shallow but Johney and I wrote a couple of nice songs that I am proud of. But, it was due time to get a better sounding mechanism.

We were in the guitar shop testing out really nice (and i-wish-i-made-more-money) guitars. I had a taste of my dream 'guy' (guitar, of course). He felt so goooood in my hands and made the loveliest of sounds. Alas, I felt that the timing wasn't right. 1) I don't have the money (yet..) 2) I don't have enough skills to earn the ultimate pleasure of handling him. Between the two, the latter is a stronger reasoning to settle for Woodie.

By to settle, I mean it wasn't as if there wasn't any other choice. Woodie was a rare case of fate knocking on my door. Abg Andy suggested the guitar to me, somehow we share the same preference for grand concert and auditorium bodied guitars compared to dreadnoughts which was abg Aidit's special quest of the moment.

It was the only one of its kind left in the shop. It was love at first chord, G to be exact. *sigh. It was really nice to hold and I like how bright and warm it sounds. The best part about it is that, I could feel the notes resonating and somehow swooping down to grab a hold of my heart.

I had to make the decision between getting Woodie or saving the money so I could get a headstart on nabbing dream 'guy'. Since I am performing, I need to have a decent sounding guitar to carry my songs. So it was decided that Woodie should be a good enough guitar to accompany me in my shows. It is my hope that what earnings I have through the help of Woodie will finance my acquisition of dream 'guy'. When the time comes, the effort would be more worth it and perhaps I would be more worthy of owning such a fine instrument.

Until then, I just have to keep on writing, improving and work hard enough so that my next guitar would be an upgrade that's more natural according to the order of the universe.

So for now, I shall let my dream 'guy', an American of German descent, be the yummy healthy carrot to drive me on and on and on. ;)

guitar2 ku sayang

It's been a while since I acted really impulsive. Yesterday, I bought a low end guitar for RM90 from a stationery and photocopy shop. Ever since school started and I had to commute from Lembah Keramat to Shah Alam, often times I find myself missing the feel of a guitar in my hands. While waiting for the bus, sandwiched on the LRT, walking to class. The heart could never forget the joy of striking a chord to chase an irresistible melody, even for a second.

Of course, my soul craves to be in constant company of the guitar, only to improve myself. I don't mind having Johney around, but I figured I need a lighter load so I could avoid a permanent spinal injury. So I have faith that Sakura Damo (I think he's Japan-born and Taiwan-bred) would be an awesome traveling companion.

From now on, I'm gonna be shameless, if I feel like there's no harm in playing the guitar at any time or place, I'm gonna take Damo out and have some fun. This surge of carpe diem bravery did not blossom overnight however. It took me a couple of shows under my belt now and this burning desire to be a better guitar player for my own self-satisfaction. The gang and I have been discussing possibilities of us basking on the streets ever since that show we did at “that green thing”. We went unplugged totally. ;)

I only knew Damo for less than 3 hours before we had our first public performance together. I tried my “best test” to tune the guitar without the trusty electronic tuner (I’m usually a serious musician and do carry a tuner around but on that day I left my little guitar bag in the big guitar bag). It sounded fairly out of tune but it wasn’t disastrous as long as the strings were tuned on each other or tuned in together, I think, I hope. There was a charity carnival at my faculty so I sang two songs of my own. Someone requested Ghost and I was like ‘how in the world do you know that song?’ It surprises me each day to chance upon people who actually heard me on the net.

Anyway, Damo and I did Ghost together. It was a rather interesting experience. I wish I could say we sounded good together. I never knew how difficult it was to play with the mic constantly picking fights with my guitar strumming hand. And to concentrate on singing pleasantly enough while your eyes glued to the yet unfamiliar fingerboard to form chords. Playing Damo is going to be a tad torturous for the upcoming weeks I’m sure, but the outcome is gonna be worth it.

Having a closer inspection of Damo, I could finally make out the pencil marks on the plywood, the lopsided brand sticker, the messy bridge … Well, I got it for a dirt cheap price anyway. Of course it doesn’t matter if he’s of a lesser quality. As long as he gets the job done i.e. translating my ideas into music and helping me to improve my playing. I should probably state the fact that I have no intention whatsoever to be an extraordinary guitarist or pull a 2 minute solo on any one of my songs; I do have an amazing gang of musicians and friends ( the MARHAENS) to back me up on that. I just hope to be more equipped in delivering my songs as it rightly deserves.

i don't know you now

Why are you avoiding me? Don't you want to be friends with me anymore?

No, it's not like that. It's not like that, at all.

Then, why won't you pick up my calls? Why are you keeping quiet all of a sudden?

...

I don't understand. We're friends, right? Friends talk to each other. Why won't you talk to me?

There's nothing to talk about.

What do you mean there's nothing to talk about? You not talking is something that we should talk about? Are you in trouble? Are you unwell? What?

It's nothing like that.

Then, what is it?

I don't want you to trouble yourself with it.

But, we're friends. Friends help each other out.

You can't help me.

We won't know unless we try.

It doesn't matter. There's nothing you could do about it.

Of course there's nothing I could do about it, I don't even know what it is. Tell me, maybe you're wrong.

It doesn't work that way.

Well, it should. I don't understand why you're behaving this way. Was it something I did or didn't do?

It's not about you.

Then tell me what's it about?

...

We've been friends for so long. How come I don't know you right now?

the things we used to do

why did we stop?
when did we stop?
i never asked, so you never told me.

was it always that simple?
were you always that simple?
i'll never change, so you never will.

LEPAQ with me

I'll be performing an acoustic set at LEPAQ Performing Arts Cafe, 22 Ground Floor, Jln 28/70A, Desa Sri Hartamas today, around 9.30pm.

This is one of those rare occasions that I'll be playing songs that I've never played in public (in the flesh).

They might be;

1. Sepasang sudu
2. Paint me
3. Something Grand
4. Head Games
5. Aku Salah

It's gonna be more intimate. I'll sing for you tonight. ;)

Come one, come all

That Green Thing


acoustic set. totally unplugged. 18 July 2008. 7pm. bring own mugs.

Sticky Post: New Nokia Fund

This is a sticky post, for the usual posts please scroll down a bit. This post stays at the top till my birthday. Hint. Wink. Wink

Now as I watch you from afar...

I lost my Nokia N95 while watching a Nokia sponsored movie. Talk about irony.

You can still call me on my number but please introduce yourself.

And don't forget to click on the adverts shown courtesy of Nuffnang.com

It's part of my New Nokia Fund.

That is all.

GrrrrLS Gig

Next gig.

back to school

The holiday is over, and I'm returning once more to campus, hopefully, for the last semester. I must admit, at first I wasn't that excited to be hitting the books again. But after the 2nd day, I am rather thrilled with what we'll be learning and going through. I am and always be a genuine sucker of finding out about stuff.

It's great that my final semester only requires 3 days of classes in a week. Therefore, I am free to do my extra-curricular activities. I was a little worried about that actually.

It's always the case that the best I could do is to do my best. ;)

4th of July

The setlist;

1. Hujan Bunga
2. Mekanika
3. Tingkap Kaca
4. Ghost
5. (Lovely Lovely Scene)
   

Hujan Bunga

Lyrics:

ramalan kaji cuaca kata aku kan jatuh cinta
the weather report said that I'll be falling in love

tapi tak pula beritahu dengan siapa
but it didn't say who's it gonna be

lalu hari ini ku berlari mencari-cari
so today, I've been running around looking for

si dia yang bakal miliki hati ini
the one whose full name is on my heart

*mungkin dia ada di situ
maybe that's him, over there

tersenyum padaku
smiling at me

namun malu-malu
ever so shyly

hujan bunga di Kuala Lumpur ini
it's raining flowers in KL

sudah tiada masa untuk mencari payung
there's no time to be looking for umbrellas

berteduh kita bawah surat khabar
lets take shelter under newspapers

lalu terbaca berita lama kata
and read the same old news

hujan ini tak akan reda
this rain won't ever stop

ikut rasa ingin sahaja aku hampirinya
if it was up to me I'll go to him

tapi ku takut apa pula kata semua
but I'm afraid of what they'll say

bukan senang untuk ku meluangkan masa ini
it's never easy to take the time for this

sekadar peluang mengisi ruang kosong hati
merely a chance to fill in this longing

*repeat

***hujan ini tak akan reda
this rain won't ever stop

Words and music by Ana Raffali (anaraffali muzik ent.)

This is one of our jam sessions. Over here we have 2/5 of the Marhaens, the lovable Iqbal on the cello, and the err..equally lovable abg Aidit on the guitar. ;p

Currently, Hujan Bunga is the song of the moment, though I wrote this song sometime last year. If you haven't guessed what it's about, it's just me having fun on the idea of love being as predictable or unpredictable as the weather.

I mean, if the report says that it's gonna rain later this evening, I'm sure some people would take the trouble to carry an umbrella wherever they go. So, if it says that you're going to fall in love tonight, are you going to be ready for it?

Well, are you?

The Marhaens

May 27, 2008 - Tuesday

25 Mei 2008 - Ana Raffali & The Marhaens.

22 Mei 2008 - Rumah Aidit Alfian bergegar! Untuk tujuan menyerikan lagi
lagu-lagu indah ciptaan "Ana Raffali", sebuah orkes "orang-orang tua berjiwa
muda" telah ditubuhkan. Orkes "The Marhaens" dianggotai oleh aiDils-akustik
gitar, Andy Silatonggek-bass, ruMie Kakikeper-Drum dan JakPA Carcosa-gitar.
Kejadian berlaku dirumah Aidit Alfian jam 3 ptg. Ditubuhkan untuk mengiring Ana
di Acoustic Nite at Annex KL.Bermula dengan lagu "Hujan Bunga" hingga ke lagu
"Masih" semua berjalan lancar hingga ke jam 9 malam.

23 Mei 2008 - Kehadiran anggota ke enam.Bagi tujuan meramai, menyempit dan
mengkelam kabutkan lagi orkes berkenaan, seorang "anak muda berjiwa tua" telah
didatangi khas dari Uitm. Pemain Cello berbakat dalam seni muzik klasikal dan
juga tarian tolak muka. Dikenali dengan nama Rem. Setelah berlaku kekeliruan dan
bunyi cello yang menyakitkan gigi & telinga, Rem berjaya membawa Ana &
The Marhains ke satu level yang lebih baik. Mainan beliau untuk lagu "Tingkap
Kaca" dan "Ghost" sungguh menambat hati. Orkes ini juga semakin mantap, dengan
lagu-lagu lain seperti "Mekanika" dan "Lovely Scene" di perdendangkan dengan
amat berkesan. Tarian ala-ala Streching dan juga tolak muka juga telah
menampakkan hasil, walau pun lenguh.

24 Mei 2008 - Hujan Bunga vs Hujan Batu.Hujan lebat mengiring latihan
mereka hari ini. Tapi ini tidak menahan semangat mereka untuk terus berlatih.
Oleh kerana ini adalah latihan terakhir sebelum mereka turun berjuang, satu set
telah digubal untuk gig tersebut. Prestasi Ana pada tahap maksima, Rumie bersama
keris Bataknya tampak lebih confident, Andy (berasal dari Thailand) terpaksa
menyeberangi Yalla, Aidit (berketurunan Jawa) lebih bersedia dengan kain pelikat
yang diikat kemas, Iqbal sanggup mengurangkan tidurnya untuk mengurangkan
sumbang cellonya dan Alfa tidak pernah kelihatan lebih segak dan bergaya dari
ini. 6 lagu akan diperdendangkan esoknya.

25 Mei 2008 - Ana Raffali di Annex!Jam 3 ptg lagi Ana & The Marhaens
telah bersedia untuk warm up. Berbekalkan senjata masing-masing, semua dah
bersedia, bersemangat menanti detik 830 mlm.Tepat masanya, bagaikan dirasuk
semua berjalan lancar. Persembahan Ana memang tidak dapat diperkatakan lagi.
Hebat!!! Tampak ayu berbaju kurung ungu. Lagu demi lagu berlalu. hinggalah ke
lagu yang ke tujuh. Syabas pada Ana. Walaupun malu-malu untuk berinterak dengan
penonton, tapi kemantapan vokalnya dapat dirasa.

Jakpa telah diajukan soalan, dan jawapan beliau berbunyi begini."Sumbangan
kami ini adalah sangat kecil, tidak sempat pun mengeluarkan bau dan peluh, hanya
sekadar ingin memantapkan lagi lagu-lagu ciptaan Ana. Walau bagaimanapun ia
tetap menjadi kenangan yang amat indah untuk saya dan anggota orkes yang lain.
Rugi pada yang tak datang tengok".

Taken from Alfa Booty's myspace.

Moonshining

I'm bringing along the Marhaens to back me up for Laundry. Oh, I like I like I like.

EDITED:

We'll play the following songs;

1. Mekanika
2. Masih
3. Lovely2 Scene
4. Ghost
5. Tingkap Kaca
6. HBKL

I'm hoping that given the annexe experience, I'll be able to communicate my songs in a more intimate and friendlier way. ;p Hope to see you there!

Earthbound Unbound

Yay!! I finished the game.

It was awesome and the ending was perfect.

But..

now there's a HUGE hole inside my chest.

home sweet home

So, I'm weeks into my semester break. (In simpler terms, it has been weeks since the last semester ends and I'm lounging around at home). I like being at home. I could not go out of the house for days and still be sane and happy. So, how do I spend my time at home huh?

A lot of time is spent on the guitar now. I mean, I'm not much of a guitar player but I hope to change that pretty soon. It's interesting to note how I have improved (even if it's little) from the videos I have posted on youtube in the past. I'm looking into writing more songs, I have sooo many things to talk about. I wish it's as easy as flipping a switch on.

Apart from that, I've been catching up on my reading. I could spend hours and hours with a book in my hand. Not that I'm a slow reader (at least I don't think I am). I just love books. Part of the objectives or goal for this break is to get my 2 nephews and niece to read. I have a plan and I will blog a whole entry about it later.

I may not look like it, but I'm actually a sucker for video games. This break has been devoted to completing as many online games as possible as well as NES games. I'm trying to complete Earthbound. It's been a while since I stopped playing it. But I'm moving into hardcore gamer mode already so it should take a couple of days more, if not less, provided that what I've written in paragraph 2 sticks.

And yes, how could I leave out my daily sudoku dosages? I loooove puzzles. Sudoku is probably one of the simplest puzzle to figure out compared to the rubic's cube. Khalil, my big bro, is the only one in my household that could finish the puzzle. I just don't understand how he does it. But I do know that he spent hours and hours of trying to figure out the pattern and all. I spent less than an hour and refuse to succumb to its evil powers.

Anyway, just sharing some stuff. ;)

RANtAi AKUSTIK NITE la voix’ de femmes

No Black Tie was awesome. Thank you very much to those who came especially Amir, Yat, Firdaus, Zeti, Junad and a bunch of others. Didn't expect you guys even knew pun. ;p

This next gig is going to be pretty awesome. I'll be playing the following songs with a band. Yay!!
In no particular order;

1. HBKL
2. Masih
3. Tingkap Kaca
4. Bukan Mekanika
5. Ghost
6. Lovely2 Scene

Hope to see you there! ;)

Learning to Care

As harsh as the truth may seem, at one time being a university student was not enough to educate me in caring for the environment. Perhaps, despite the university’s effort in promoting a cleaner learning atmosphere, I was just being dismissive by choosing to leave all the work to those who got paid to do it rather than taking up some of the work myself. I used to think that I’m already doing my share by throwing my trash in the bin and that was all I need to be sure that I was a good enough citizen. But I soon learned that I could do more, that caring for the environment can be a culture that each and every one of us may learn to live by.

I was given the opportunity to join the student exchange program in Japan in 2006, I was delighted beyond compare. Here was the chance for me to fulfill one of my dreams, which is to experience life in the land of the reddish sun. Life in Japan has opened up my mind to a myriad of things. The sight, smell, sound, taste and touch of everything that is new bring about a wonderful experience. In turn I realized that what makes up this amazing country do not lay solely upon the tall buildings or efficient railway system, or the advance in telecommunications etc. but more importantly on the people themselves. I was given the golden opportunity to immerse myself in the culture of the Japanese people. And one of the most important philosophies I have learned is “mottainai”.
It is difficult to explain the literal meaning of “mottainai”. Shimizu-sensei, my professor on Japanese studies in Bunkyo Gakuin University (BGU), Tokyo, always compared it to the Malay old adage that mothers use in telling their children if they don’t finish their food, “nanti nasi menangis” (then the rice will cry). Japanese mothers instill the culture of treating everything as precious by not wasting them even in their children and I was able to see this through being in the company of my Japanese friends. Every time they see that I had some food left on my plate, they would offer to finish them. In time I learned to grab my chopsticks and finish my food on my own heartily. This simple act of not wanting to let things go to waste extends further in the lives of the Japanese people. It is fact that Japan is leading the way to a safer and cleaner environment in line with not letting this earth go to waste.

At first, I thought Shimizu-sensei was an old eccentric when I saw him writing notes on the back of printed papers but soon discover that it was an excellent alternative to sending them to the recycling bin. If people don’t know any better, they would assume that he was just being cheap, but consider how much the little things that he do would give back to nature, forests are protected, energy is reserved. I was also impressed with what I saw when I was staying with my Japanese family. In the kitchen, there were two bins; one for burnable items, the other was for unburnable items. I’m assuming that the unburnable items refer to items such as glass bottles and plastics that may be recycled, whereas the burnable refers to normal household waste. In Malaysia, the culture of recycling seems to have yet to catch up in modern households. But the city of Tokyo is decorated with plenty of color and picture coded recycling bins that line up the streets making it more convenient for people to uphold the idea of reduce, reuse and recycle.

When BGU held a “Green Day” on the 9th of November 2006, an army of students clad in bright green jackets that was more than a fashion statement scoured the university compound in search of the notorious substance called litter. The enthusiasm that they portrayed in participating in the activity sums up their understanding of the importance of taking part in efforts to care for the environment. Even though there were hardly any trash lying around to begin with, the mere thought of the activity itself is commendable. I was impressed by this small yet meaningful gesture of caring of which I hope to bring back to Malaysia.

Now I am more particular about using my resources and doing my share to help caring for, not my but our environment. I print new notes on the blank side of my old materials, finish the rice on my plate, recycle plastic bottles and papers, and many more. Although all of these may sound as hardly worth mentioning, as they are bigger environmental problems out there in the world, I do believe that it’s alright for us to think small so that in time the changes will be big.

Live at No Black Tie

So I'm gonna be sharing the stage with some very talented people. It's gonna be awesome. Below is the potential setlist (in no particular order);

1) Hujan Bunga di Kuala Lumpur
2) Tingkap Kaca
3) Bukan Mekanika
4) Ghost
5) Lovely Lovely Scene
6) My Darling

Hope to see you there! ;)

Gardening

Everyone must leave something behind when he dies, my grandfather said. A child or a book or a painting or a house or a wall built or a pair of shoes made. Or a garden planted. Something your hand touched some way your soul has somewhere to go when you die, and when people look at that tree or that flower you planted, you're there. It doesn't matter what you do, he said, so long as you change something from the way it was before you touched it into something that's like you after you take your hands away. The difference between the man who just cuts lawns and a real gardener is in the touching, he said. The lawn cutter might just as well not have been there at all; the gardener will be there a lifetime. - Granger, Farenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury.

10) John Mayer

taken from here

Despite the fact that my love, the phantom, has a particular animosity towards this particular human, I still think John Mayer (JM) is awesome. (but, darling you're the best!)

I remembered when his songs arrived on our airwaves. And the tv kept on showing "No Such Thing", so I kinda knew him from the start, at least at the start of his big international break. But, I wasn't really a listener. In fact, when "Your Body is A Wonderland" came out, I had a certain dislike towards this seemingly shallow personality. I recalled riding on the bus and listening to the radio and commenting, "What the heck was this guy thinking?".

But, I have forgiven him over the years and slowly I warmed up to him. The turning point was when I heard "Daughters" in the car and thought, "Hey, isn't this that wonderland guy?" and the line that caught me was [with my heart in my hand]. Man, that's very powerful and not to mention graphic.

So I got the chance to see him while I was in Japan. (Please click here if you haven't read my account of the event plus how corny and obsessive I was.)

I like JM because his songs are the kind that I would write myself. Take "3x5", one of my favorite songs on this entire planet, about wanting to share real moments with someone who is not nearby. I like how the song has a rather hopeful feel to it [you'll be with me next time I go outside, no more 3x5s (photos), just no more 3x5s]. Another song that demonstrates this is "Back to You". I think what's very endearing about this song is that it has the simplest, honest lyrics and they just flow effortlessly with the strong melody.

What is more, I like how his latest album is musically different and more complex (even sexier). It shows how he has grown as an artist as well as a person. Apart from that, he has a pretty wicked sense of humor and is a blogger (do write more, JM!) too. Yeah, we're kindred spirits. ;p

Top 10 Favorites II

Here's an update on my ranking of males with voices I wouldn't mind climbing on a car heading to the end of the world with.

1. Daniel Johns (silverchair) - Reflections of A Sound
2. Mathieu Bauer - Again
3. Damien Rice - Cannonball
4. Ken Christianson - Pornographic Audio
5. Matthew Bellamy (MUSE) - Falling Away with You
6. JR Richards (Dishwalla) - Surrender the Crown
7. Jason Mraz - Mr. Curiosity
8. Thom Yorke (Radiohead) - All I Need
9. Jamie Scott (and the town) - When Will I See Your Face Again
   
10. John Mayer - 3x5

I'm gonna do some sort of a cover story on how my musical love affairs with the gentlemen on the above list started and perhaps share some interesting bits about them.

buses and trains

I’m on my break and I’m only one semester away from graduation, hopefully. I’m moving back in with my parents since I won’t be staying near campus anymore. My roomies are already done with their degree which means I’ll be on my own for my final semester. And honestly, I don’t feel like going through the process of finding new roommates. So, we agreed that I should commute. I kind of like riding the buses and trains to get to places. You see so many things everyday.

It kinda gets on my nerve to see inconsiderate people hogging onto seats when people more deserving are left standing uncomfortably. That’s why, at times I rather stand. Often times, I’m really vocal about it. So don’t be surprised if I ask you to give up your seat to the poor parents struggling with little kids or to the fella with the walking stick.

something grand

I once knew a man
believed his life was his
bended all the rules
he would not suffer fools.

They left him to die,
while the sun was high.

But if,
I were in his shoes,
I won't let them shoot me
I would fight
my way into the night.

I once knew a child
Believed she own the world
Fed it with her dreams
So it would grow long limbs.

They call out her name,
and put her to shame.

But if,
I were in her place,
I won't let them play me
I would tear
them so they wouldn't dare.

For all of the lies that
we have been so gently fed
For all of the dreams that
they have forced us to forget

It's so easy to bow down
get up now,
get off the ground.
It's time to take a stand for your demands.
It's time to make demands for something grand.

Words and music by Ana Raffali (anaraffali muzik ent.)

My darling

Here I am, my darling
Why did you turn away,
My throat is dry
there's nothing more to say

I'd give you anything,
as long as it would bring
water to my lips
your love on my ring

*don't say you don't need me,
I already know
you want me to leave you
but I won't let go
someday you will learn
to point out the sign
so pour me your love,
since you've drunk all of mine.

time to quench your doubt
you already know
what this is about
you and I
forget the past
ignore all the rest
they mean nothing

there's only us, my darling
my heart's better half
rid me of this thirst
love me for myself

I've given you everything
what more do you need
do not resist me
just follow my lead

*repeat

there's only us, my darling
when will you come to me?

Words and music by Ana Raffali (anaraffali muzik ent.)


Will update you on;
1) Acoustic Musings
2) Being unwell

Acoustic Musings

courtesy of theattic and aboutthelettera.com

e for eggs

when i was a little girl, i was rather picky when it comes to food. when mummy cooked something i don't feel like eating, i won't eat at all. but, abah found a way to make sure that i'd never go hungry. he would fry eggs for me. not just any fried eggs, but the real nice crispy brown that only i know how to appreciate. so throughout my childhood, i considered myself to be very privelleged to have exactly what i want, when i want it.

and even now, everytime i go home, abah would always ask me "nak telur?", and always i would say yes, please, thank you daddy! and when abah would pretend that he thought i've eaten, mummy would step up to the frying pan. i loooooove em both.

my best buddy, faizah says i'm sooooo easy to please. she cooks me nice crispy brown eggs too and i'd marry her if i could.

i wonder if i would grow up to be exactly as i am now without the protein in those millions of fried eggs i've consumed. always insisting for it exactly as i want it. obstinate, hard-headed, determined, obsessive, tough to crack unlike humpty dumpty.

as long as i learn to watch myself, i'll be fine.

g for ghost

I was saving this entry to write about one of my favorite own songs, i.e. ghost. But, I change my mind. This entry will be on the other ghost that I love, i.e. the opera ghost.

For those of you who have yet to read the The Phantom of the Opera by Gaston Leroux, I highly recommend it to you. Do not settle for Andrew Lloyd Webber's musical only, although it is my favorite musical of all time. The original (or translated version of the french original) would give you more insight and depth to the main character, of which I love, Erik.

The book raises some important questions, most crucial would be, does appearance play an important part when it comes to love?

Now, if you haven't guessed by now, I am a hopeless romantic. And since I am in love with THE PHANTOM anyway, of course looks do not matter to me. I should picture myself in Christine's shoes, haunted by the mysterious gorgeous voice that sings beautifully in my ear every waking hour. *sigh

But, really. How do you measure your love for a person? By the look of her cute lopsided smile? His beautiful soulful eyes? Or through the feel of her hand in yours? His heartwarming crooning voice? If we measure love mainly on the physical aspects, then no wonder phantoms never knew love.

So what do you call it then? Say you've never seen her in person, but you know her for herself, and she's every strength you wish for in someone you could love and be loved by. What if he's not exactly what you would call, prince charming, but possess the qualities that made mere physical features seem irrelevant. Perhaps in his emotional toughness and the will to make things happen. Would you call it nothing?

So what do you call it then? When the mere knowledge of his presence, even if it transcends physical and proximity, fills you with enormous pleasure. Every kind word uttered, harsh truth spewed upon the moment, by her and nobody else, seem to echo and resonate every time your thoughts creep on her. Is that nothing?

I could safely say that I would fall for the phantom of the opera and if I were Christine, I would have been happy with him. Even if it seems like pity over him being loveless, this portrayal of compassion should illustrate the idea of unconditional love. To love somebody without asking anything in return, or even needing anything in return, save for that love that brings me joy.

Why? Because I understand him in a way. He was a genius, should angels make the most beautiful sound, he would sing like one. He was an architect, a composer, he made things with his own hands. He had risen above his poor upbringing, to become somebody who would accomplished his goals. Ruthless and calculative, passionate and headstrong. And the only think he was lacking of was someone to share his life with. Nobody was able to look beyond his deformity, despite the genius in him. And that, my dear friends, is a tragedy.

I don't blame him for resulting into violence, perhaps it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Someone with a monstrous face should also have the heart of a monster or perhaps even be heartless. Why not live up to people's expectations for once. Why should he be kind, when nobody has ever shown him what kindness means? Alas, all he ever wanted was someone to love him for himself and nothing more.

My tears were streaming down my cheeks towards the end of the book. I cried for Erik and for all the love I could have for him, given the chance. I cried for my bitterness and for this never-ending search to be loved for myself. I cried because there's nothing more appropriate than to flush out the accumulated frustration.

Anyway, this is a song that I'm working on and it began with the end of Erik.

Here I am, my darling
Why did you turn away
My throat is dry
there's nothing left to say

I'd give you anything
as long as it would bring
water to my lips
your love on my ring

don't say you don't need me
cause' darling, I've known
you want me to leave you
but I won't let go
someday you will learn
to point out the signs
so pour me your love
since you've drunk all of mine

Here I am, my darling
my heart cut in half
rid me of this thirst
love me for myself

I've given you everything
what more do you need?
do not resist me
just follow my lead

don't say you don't need me
cause' darling, I've known
you want me to leave you
but I won't let go
someday you will learn
to point out the signs
so pour me your love
since you've drunk all of mine

It's funny that some people don't see that love should be blind.

Photo courtesy of aboutthelettera.com

q for questions

My dearest, are you there?

Did I ever thank you properly?
You're asking me what for?
Are you telling me you don't know?
So what was all this while for?

Are explanations ever really necessary?
You are taking pleasure in this, aren't you?
Does being less honest and see-through work?
Would it make any difference to either me or you?

Why do you think it's best not to think too much?
What else is there to do besides finding out answers?
Do you think I will run out of questions?
Are you tired of giving me your answers?

How long will these questions last?
Does forever really exist as they often say?
Or must we unlearn how to tell the time?
Will you tell me how, what do you say?

y for you

maybe

it's late and all is quiet
you're late and I am tired
it's cold and I am trembling
you're cold and this is troubling

maybe you're not really coming

I should have learned
not to make
the same mistake
but you
know that I would risk it
for you
in time you'll be
on your way
be led astray
but I
know that I'll be waiting
for you

it's sad but I won't cry
I'm sad cause' this is dry
it's fine though it's not fair
I'm fine so long as you're there

maybe I should leave you alone

I should have learned
not to make
the same mistake
but you
know that I would risk it
for you
in time you'll be
on your way
be led astray
but I
know that I'll be waiting
for you

Words and music by Ana Raffali (anaraffali muzik ent.)

Photo courtesy of aboutthelettera.com

s for sushi

I cannot resist the call of sushi. Even though I'm full from lunching with a full plate of rice and the usual favorites (ikan keli goreng garing and gulai masak lemak cili padi), given the opportunity to eat sushi, I'd grab at it with an open mouth.

I love sushi-eing with my pals. I just love the lightness and casual approach of consuming sushi. I can be a real p*g sometimes when it comes to food. Well, I love to eat, what else is there to say?

Eating heavy food like a piece of steak would require deft skills and patience with the cutlery. The chiming sounds I make occasionally while devouring the meat is horribly annoying. On the other hand, I find eating rice with dishes using fork and spoon diminishes its homely appeal. I always prefer eating food with my (constantly clean in an almost OCD style) hand as it provides a more fulfilling multi-sensory experience, as well as the chance of being romanticized as unsophisticated and barbaric by my western friends.

But there is no conflict when it comes to sushi. I'm most comfortable with it. I could never resist the delightfully simple and unpretentious taste of the kanikama maki (crabstick). And I can pick up a big piece of tuna-mayo (another favorite although I had never seen or eaten one while I was in Tokyo) and it'll disappear into my mouth in one go. I probably would scare off guys with my whole-some approach to food, but who needs 'em anyway when you have the good stuff.

v for valentino

I love Valentino Rossi. He's the most awesome motorcycle racer in the world as well as my obsession at one point of time in my life. I adored him so much that I made my relationship with a particular guy difficult just because I placed Valentino on the top of my list instead of him. Hahaha.. [insert appropriate adjective here] old times.

(But you have nothing to worry about, because you are definitely on my list.)

Since we're in the letter, lets talk about v for valentine. Post-valentine's day saw me at Fiescanto Cafe, singing my heart out with my Johney accompanied by my awesome guitarist friend, Aidit.

Photo by aboutthelettera.com

I sang about 9 songs, pretty crazy if you ask me. Good thing my songs are devoid of any guitar solos and long riffs. Well, we were given 45 minutes to take over the stage. And 45 minutes is a long time.

I was extremely nervous prior to the performance. I have no idea why. It's not like I've never performed my songs in public before. I guess it's part of what to be expected before shows, the excitement. But once I got up there and sing, I just start settling down and relax.

(Abg) Ahmad, my friend who's practically part of my family, was the first one to perform. He covered a number of well-loved songs with his sister, Naya--on the mic, as well as some of Naya's originals. This guy is awesome, one of the guys in my list of people with fingers I would like to break.

Before ending his set, he invited me to sing an old song of mine that kinda started to convince me that I could actually write songs, even if I don't know the rules. He played it so wonderfully with a bit of his own twist to make it sound more complete. I think it was around this time that I stopped having cockroaches in my tummy (cuz it's hard to imagine butterflies being nasty).

And then it was my turn to pick up Johney. I had a little chat with the crowd and introduced the first song, Lovely Lovely Scene. Now, I had a good vibe with this song, because my friend is an awesome guitarist and so I only had to play during the chorus. But when it was 'the' chorus, I realized that (and trying hard not to panic) that my Johney wasn't plug in! What a way to start..



Here's a recording of the show taken by one of my best buddies, Amir.

Yup, it was pretty embarrassing. But I'd like to think that I redeem myself with the next song.

I would have shared with you the entire set, if my camera didn't run out of battery. Yup, silly me forgot to charge the camera before the show. Well, what do you expect? There would be no point in recording it in the first place if I didn't make sure that we sounded decent enough.

But what I can say is, it was a blast. Thank you to Bok and Fiescanto Cafe for the delicious food and opportunity to express my thoughts in sounds to all of you, my friends who were curious enough to make sure that I could actually sing and the rest who makes sure that I would never stop. It was indeed something to remember.

Thank you still, to all of those who would have been there if they could. I'm gonna make sure that we recreate the moment and have it recorded just for you.